Itz been SO long

Hey there! So... June holidays are gonna be over... awww sadded. but yeah, i've changed a lot the past few weeks that i haven't been blogging. =) not exactly sideways or vertically =P, but that the fact i no longer like HIM is a change. Lol. I also am looking forward to bein optimistic about everything and anything. And also to lead life with a smile. A big one =D . haharx. anieways, i'm almost done with English. I still got A maths which i intend to fully do tomorrow and malay. Malay is to read a book so i'll probably do it today, later. so what has been going on in my life? basically, i wrote stories. Short stories of my own fantasies. I have yet to make any progress with my Chocolate bloggie but i'll start on it soon. Not too soon though. then... the last two days, i've been marching! yes..footdrills. The first day was actually taught by our PLs... but then the second day it was taught by Yong Meng.. an Ncc guy.. and boi oh boi..didnt he juz LOVE torturing us gals.. i was shouting myself hoarse wif da timing..and we went on and on ..marchin like TOY Soldiers... =D so tat was basically it..todae juz spent my dae doing my hw.. =D guai gia... however u spell it..so yeahh.. wateva.. so yeah.. Adios!

I need some love?

Hmmmm... i feel like dumping something here. Right now. Haizz... why do some people have all the love that they don't need? Don't you ever wonder why it is always the girl or those girls that are very good-looking that gets the attnetion of all the guys; be it handsome or not. And why do some girls have so many ex boyfriends wen you don't even have one? It sets you thinking. I know it is stupide but i've only experienced long-distance relationship; crudely, online thang. I dun mind people laughing at me over it cos i have nothing to be ashamed of exceot for the fact that i cant catch some local fish. But what can i do really?I dun flirt da way some gals juz do. I dun even noe if i flirt. i dun fawn openly on the person i like. I am too shy to tell the person that i like him. Seriously, i am a shy person only that this trait is foreign to those who noes me well. I'd rather watch the person i like go wif some other gal den i go up to him and sae.. i like u.. haizz...da trouble wif bein... in da society where chubby is ugly..kakakak... aniewaes..me goin off now.. tomoro go hospital alone for check up...haizz...

Tis is Irfan again! =) so cute =) and his eyes are like mine... =P 

tis is Irfan!! my lil nephew! =)  

tis is our bundle of joy! =)  

Things to Do this Hols

June Calender:

2nd June - Civil Defence Course [Guides] Bukit Batok HQ ; 7.45 am
6th June - Hospital Checkup at TTSH ; 10.15 am
14th June - Shi Pei Bdae
18th June - Zu Er Bdae
20th June - Combined Uniformed Group Training ; 10am - 12pm
21st June - Combined Uniformed Group Training ; 10am - 12pm

K..done... den 27th June school start again..wahh.. vry fast derhx.. ok..now is things to complete...

1. 10 A.Maths questions from ten years series ; Pink Book ; Foolscap
2. E. Maths questions on the portal then do mind-map
3. POA worksheet to be completed
4. MT to complete book review
5. Guides' Literary Arts ; Write about authors from different countries
6. Guides' Conservation [Electricity]; Do poster and do scrapbook; pictures
7. Guides' Proficiency; Do summary on books from the East and West.
- English-
8. Write summary on 4 articles from Straits Times;Express opinion in 100 words; select 5 words and explain the meaning in less than 7 words.
9. Do book summary ; pick one novel.
10. 2 compositions
11. Letter Writing

I tink tts abt all bahxx... so for da next few weeks i wont blog in.. lotsa stuff to do..and now keep going hospital cos my sis wanna give birth but den... da baby dun wan come out yet..wahhhh.. i noe y lerhx...he noes dat da world is a happy yet STRESSFUL place... i'll do my bez to pamper him.wahahhaha... I like... =P

Sadded larhx

Hey..sry for not bloggin again yesterday. haharx. was too lazy when reach home late. hmmm... 3 daes lerhx i nvr see him.... u sae kelian anot? haizz.. yesterdae and today... went com lab straight afta... but went out for a while ...met Sharafat..he said that Mrs Lim wanted to see us tomorrow during the Deyi Idol thingy to talk about emceeing for Prize Giving...wahh piangg.. so tut lorhx...its true wat Bistine said... they [ da teachers] wud juz keep coming on you... me ok wif it arhx..but is like i tink Mirliana deserve it more. Cos is like she shud be able to shine too...haizz...dunno larhx.. den tomolo got master parade lorhx!!! dey didnt inform us until todae lorhx...wahh piangg.. so tut rite??? stoopid larhx...later hafta iron da stoopid uniform larhx...wahhh..cannot make it larhx... den Saturday PTM [Bak Chang giv da name derhx..] parent teacher meeting larhx... mama wanted to go..haizz... tat Miss Lim surely got a lot to say lorhx... ''Nura's behaviour in class is sometimes not acceptable. Being a councillor she shoud set a better example for her classmates......'' haizz... sian den dunno larhx... sian.. tomolo tot last dae of sch [term larhx] , can go out den take neoprints or sth... but haizz..why muz Guides' alwaes spoil my fun derhx? sianz!!! i beta ciao now..see ya!

In school...

Wahahahha..itz like way afta sch now...haharx.. den so sianz.. dunno wat to do..juz sit around while waitin for Nas and Sharifah to finish thier wateva thingy..wahahha...is like os tut lorhx..den cos of tis, i didnt get to see him lorhx..sadded larhx..

so far todae is quite slak arhx..no Pe..cos rainin..wahh...shud haf pon..dun come sch...den can sleep and enjoy da cool weather.wahahahha... but...saw a lil bit of him now and then juz now arhx..durin recess dat time..wahahahha..cannot make it larhx..me sae wan forget him but cannot forget hjim lorhx...whahahaha...lame rite?? i dunno larhx... haharx...siaz now.. >_<'''

later i go home dunno wat time arhx...i'll blog in again arhx..haharx...cannot make it!!! now is me still thinkin of him lorhx...haizz...why he go bak so early?? so sadded... wahhhhh... if oni he didint go home early.. mayb he tot i go home lerhx so he oso went bak? cos i alwaes stay in canteen arhx before i go anywhere arhx...ut todae i straight come lab... wahahha.. in m dreams bahx... he doesnt even noe i really exist lorhx...i am nth significant in his life.... >_< sadded larhx... haha.. nvrm arhx.. i go see those two siao zhar bo... haharx..see ya ppl later..i blog in again later arhx...

Pssssst... i got see his naked top before!! haharx!! so happiee..but is like..everyone can see it lorhx... haizz..lame... if oni i can like see it again in real life before he leaves..... haizz...

Stressed Out

I am like so stressed at home!! I cant take it anymore... all da way wen i was out wif my family to AMK central, i was like....havin suicidal thoughts... i'm like tinkin... ''will popping too many painkillers kill you??'' wahahhahaha... cannot make it lorhx... *sigh* i've nvr felt so..... pressured before.... i juz am not lookin forward to da hols...tis kinda things i've nvr felt b4..i mean in da past even wen i'm stressed out by my family and all, i'd cry it all out...but now..is like my tears juz wont come out... i somehow lost all my vocabs and language to express my feelings to my fwens... all i cud tink abt is... ''will popping too many painkillers kill you??" haharx. so yeahh... juz hope i can still take it... i've been tinkin abt it... itz bez to let t out but i juz cant... now i noe y some ppl are so silly as to hurt themselves or commit suicide.... i juz get tat feelin..... i hope my nerve string wont juz snap and i go bonkers and wen sc reopen..i wont be in sch...kakakakka... will be in da netherworld???? kakakakakaka cannot make it larhx... haizz... beta go do my A maths now arhx... oh yarx... todae i was truly happie wen went J8 wif Nas, Sherry and Meche.... went to take neoprint and oso go eat ... haharx... fun sia... now at home... so stress... now my sis ask me go do laundry.. wahhh... i havent even do my hw... and do my filing of POA stuff.... talk abt bein stressed out. bahx. x_x'''

Time to let go

its time to let go now.... i dunno wat i did or thought abt but i noe rite now at tis moment, tat its time to let go of him.... i'm nt worthy of him.... oh well... i shall... juz close my eyes and drift away from him... but dere are reasons y its so hard to let go... at nite wen i cant sleep ...wen i tink some ghost or monster is gna haunt me, i thought of him... i fantasize abt him and da silly thoght of a ghost or monster juz vanished.... wen i get lonely.. wen i tink i can no longer take it anymore... i tohught of his words... thought of his life... his determination.. i realise i can do it... i can ace it and carry on wif life.. he's da reason y i find goin to school a breeze... and lil sth in life tt i look forward to... for 2 weeks i suffered from insomnia cos of him... yet i went to sch each and every day...happie and lookin forward to seein him... but tis muz nt go on... i muz curb my feelins for him... so wat if i haf his email? so wat if i noe his blog? so wat if we school da same school? so wat if we're n da same level? so wat? so wat if i like him? its all over... true i need someone to love me =) but i cant afford bein blinded by my love for him tt like wat Nas said.. u nvr noe dat da person who will be by ur side in ur time of need is da one whom u've closed ur eyes to look at someone else... meaning... da person whom loves me and appreciates me mite be beside me but i wudnt noe as i haf my eytes trained oni at tt one guy.... so yeahh... i will need help and encouragement... i cant let him haunt me anymore.. ok..so yeahh..i will still haf his pic on my com desk..but it takes time..and i believe, Time Heals All Wounds.

Without You

The month of June is coming soon.... =( i hafta sae i'm SO nt lookin forward to it yet... i mean... how da heck am i to see him then??? on MSN we dun tok... [tts sad isnt it?] hmmm... wat am i to do?? urgh!! i hate tis kinda situation... its alwaes me sufferin... read his testimmonials tat he doesnt talk to gals tat much..wahahahha..cute isnt it?? but then...dun talk to gals...den how?? wahhh... >_<"' den i keep tinkin of him..canot make it lorhx... read tat he was hurt so many times b4..hmmm... poor him.. i cant guarantee tt dere wont be quarrels shud we be together [=P] but i wont hurt him so much cos hurtin him is tantamount to me hurtin myself.... hehe... me tink too deep lerhx..wahahhaha.. cannot make it larhx... =) todae so sian...tot of goin J8 or go Far East take pics..wahhaha...budden... nbd to follow me...mei yo ren yao pei wo.... ='( but nvrm... wahhaha... me school stuff habent finish..maybe later me go....... central?? wahhh... or go J8 take pic of meself larhxx..wahahha... anieways...tts all i can sae... main topic..cant forget abt him.. and tat june is comin!!! argh!! hopefully can still see him bahhx.. den on 2nd June still hafta go Guides course...wahhhh...cannot make it lorhx..tot of takin taxi wif my sistaz go there den Mrs Ang make me be ah-ma to da rest and go along wif them..cos is da place we dunno derhx.. wahhh... x_x''' haharx! me beta go now bah =) see ya! .:You will always be inside my heart:. .:I hope that i have a place in your heart too:. .:First Love - Hikaru Utada:.

haizz

Went for breakfast wif me family juz now... i mean tis morning....then went market area there...go buy stuff...den come bak home... sian now.. i dunno arhx..but i cant stop tinkin of him lerhxx... oni those who really close to me noe who da 'Him' is.... i heard he got gf lerhxx..but yarhx..dunno arhx..now like gt no news derx... hmmm...nvrm bahxx....as long as he is happiie...den ok lerhx.. =) me nowadaes like errr... happiee plus sadded... wahahaha.... like... dunno larhx how to sae... been listening to sadded songs... wahahaha..siao... hmmm..somemore,,,come online but nobody tok to me..sian lorhx... hmmm...den go frensta..oni accept ppl addin me..den sian..no testi arhx...den dunno larhx...like suddenly my life now is vry mundane.... wahhh... tink i muz stop usin errr... singlish??? wahahha...shari sae he read my frensta..he like..cannot believe my english tt 'lan' [bad] wahahahha... cannot make it arhx... me gt nth to write lerhxx...see u ppl later bahxx...if gt thing to sae i'll post bahx... later mayb me post OOC pics...vry little derhxx..

Rock On!!

We did it!! I did it!!! da OOC was a success!! lol! i still cnat believe its now ALL OVER. oh yeahh! so...ahem.. we were vry professional abt it... hmmm...lol.. Reggie was there to perk me up... actually..to perk everyone up... he did tat.. errr... chinese kungfu thingy on my bak to ease my tension... god bless his sweet soul...and Mir slow danced wif me too...Bistine cheered me on and Mrs Ang hugged me.. =) Miss Rachel and Shah gave me their support.. lol its was really sweet of them.. =) afta da OOC, we all wen to da quadrangle [which is oni for important ppl] =P , to eat..wahahahahha... so nicce...da food... wahh piangg...if canteen food like tat horx..tink Deyians all will be 'fei' like me... wahahha.. Then todae... went to see me bro... ''Eddy Boi'' tts wat dey all call him... wahhh..stylo sia da name... me..abit nervous seeing him...so many years nvr see him... but he has changed... he is short.... me taller haharx!! yay!! but yeahh... he's really changed and i hope he wud remain dat way throughout now and nt get into anymore trouble... =) den..wat else did we do... stayed wif him for a few hours... Mummy Sarah and Sister Mas...my eldest sis... were there too... complicated family portrait.lol. den went to world trade to haf dinner... den went home.. on com...blog..den sian.. haharx..me beta go now..see ya!

W Belong Together

My step-bro is..... somewhere ard... my dad called him juz now... =) its a gd thing... cos dey dun talk much to each other... but yeahh...we're gna visit him somedae.. ohh!!! A-wang is like no longer retarded!!!! lol! tokin abt da chinese drama serial on tv evrydae at 7.. lol [advertisin].. so cool!! wonder wat will happen now.. lol anieways..todae nth much happen derhx... didnt get to see him much too..juz saw early in da mornin... haharx. cannot make it bahx... =) anieways..me betta go now... tomolo OOC lerhx... so scaredd.... =X

fruitful dae..

it was a VRY tiring dae!! wahhh...i went bak school at ard... 1.50pm then met up wif Mir at da canteen den Kat came...follwed by Bistine... =) so we sat till ard 2.15pm den we went to da places where we were needed. Bistine, Mir and me we were sittin dwn at da chairs in da hall and talkin wen Shah came along..den later follwed by Mrs Ang.. lol.. Reggie was a lil late cos he went to take his daddy's white shirt... lol sweet... den we started da rehearsal..i made a few blunders at da first round..... lol den we had our dinner..it was like only 4.30pm ?? lol!! then we were like singing oldies songs... we really make a GREAT, SPLENDID and FANTABULOS team together!! then as we sat da da round wooden table...we were laffin and really havin fun! =) then we changed and were singing again.lol... all too soon, da second rehearsal starts...and to my horror, there were a large crowd... i didnt tink students dat many wud turn up.... so yeahh... i tried my best... =) wen it was over..we were so happie...but our happiness were shortlived... at 8.00pm which was to be our dismissal time, we started da third rehearsal... cos of da lightings and stuff... *sigh* imagine all our heavy sighs... so we supported on each other... wen da band members came to da backstage to take position, we fanned them and talked to them..we sort of entertained each other backstage..it ink its sweet..its like...this is da time where we really come ''together as one'' [u go Reggie!!] and look out for each other and cheer each other on.... =) it was cool...den went home wif Mir..till da bus stop there... sad news tho..no half-day tomolo... sadded larhx... am yawning like nbd business now..beta go sleep larhx.. see ya peeps! Emcees, ROCK ON!!! ^_^

sry arhx...

hmmmm.... its been a few daes nvr update lerhxx... wat to do... me so sian larhx... now me lips ok lerhx.... den now i'm bak in action wif da emceein thing lorhx!! haharx! well.... tomolo is da full-dress rehearsal..cant wait... lol hmmmm.... me like vry sian now...tok to u ppl later bahxx..see ya! btw..da new song make me so......forlorn..wahahahhaha...

The Surgery

Had my surgery yesterdae... it was SO like one of those ER episodes... so scary..lol so here was wat happened. came at.. 11.40am at TTSH... den register..den had to wait...around 12.20pm like tat they call me go change.. wahh piangg... change until nvr wear anything lorhx underneathe... den sit down..wearin da hospital clothings... den waited.. see alot ppl oso come and go... den i sit there dunno until wat time.. like until nobody there liao..left me alone.. den oni dey call me... I went inside da other room.... den walk walk walk den reach the surgery room..but before enter da surgery room got another small room... so i sit down there first... den my doctor come out.. Dr Marcus Wong... [cute lehh] lol. den he checked the thing on my lip.. [its a growth i tink..] den he said ok.. den went off.. so i juz sit and wait..den beside me got one box..i tink dustbin..inside got needles..syringes.. got blood..wahhhh... i cannot tahan aledi.. den i sit down and wait for a few more minutes..den da nurse call me come into da surgery room... wahhh... it was juz like da room in ER... there's a..bed [??] in da middle..den da big lights.. all da stuff all around... den my doctor came in towards me wif a BIG syringe and needle... wahhh.. den he said.. ''u may close ur eyes''.. i close lorhx..den he poke dat needle on my lower lip..da place where got dat thing..wahh.. PAIN!! den b4 all this happened, wen i came into da room rite..got tis one malay auntie and indian uncle..dey vry nice derhxx.. dey joke wif me all tat... so i wont be scared... den afta her poked aledi.. i feel nth on my lower lip.. wahhh.. den dey put layers of da green cloths.. den cover my face...except mouth area... den two docs lerhx..my doc and a trainee doc..wahh..its da trainee who do da surgery lrohx..my doc juz supervise..wahh piangg.. den dey nvr make me go sleep lorhx..so i can hear wat dey tokin and can feel abit wat dey doin... dey say stuff like ''cut it tis wae is betta.. if u cut it tt way..da lip may blah blah blah..'' wahh pinag..i listen oso my heart pingpingpongpong..wahahha den cut cut cut den dey stitch.. can feel da thread arhx... its brown color.. den ok..can relax lerhx..den change..den go hoome..take medicine first arhx... den..hmm... suppose to go home straight but mama go HDB there..meet sis... den there my lip pain lerhx... da numbness go away... wahhh cannot tahan llorhx.. den go home take taxi...den eat medicine..den dey all go sis new hse..i alone at home..so i chat arhx..wif.. one borin guy..den wen kenny come online..i chat wif him arhx.. needed to talk to someone mahh..haharx.. den he vry..inspirational arhx.. =) den afta dat..cannot tahan liao..go offline..sleep.. haharx.. cannot make it larhx... haharx.. den todae wake up... no pain arhx..den da stitches changed to white color... haharx... den ok arhx... den time eat medicine.. u noe i cannot swallow tablets or pills mahh... but Kenny's words were on my head lorhx... ''Nothing is Impossible" and "Believe in yourself" so i did and baamm! i swallowed my medicines!!! lol so happiie now larhx!! hahahrx.. betta go now..see ya!!

Wahhhhh....

hmmmmm.... so far... i've oni failed 2 subjects... Bio and POA.... wahahha.. denn..da rest all quite ok..except Pyshics not yet... hmmm..wat else... todae... is quite slack i tink.... Sharifah got higher than me for English...wahhh... muz strive harder arhx... den..todae afta sch...sat at da canteen.... talk wif Nas... den Ravi came den he gna audition for da Deyi Idol thingy..wahahaha... kinda cute rite? lol anieways..for todae..nth much to sae..juz came home early afta da short emcee rehearsal... den walked to da bus stop... den didnt hafta wait for da bus cos 76 came at da rite time... lol den inside bus sit alone..listen to music... mentally rehearsing my lines for da OOC thingy... hmmm..tomolo goin for operation lerhx...so scaredd....... at 12.15pm ish da thingy..so hafta reach there earlier arhx... wahhhh.... i so scared!!! help me!! by the way.. i purchased two things on ebay yesterdae.. lol an anklet and bracelet.. anklet is Foo Fang Jun derhx... hahar... he buyin for his sis... den he pay half of mine..wahahahhaha...funny lorhx... anieways...i go now larhx..gt nth to write derhx... last words... me wardrobe is vry neat todae..haharx.. cleaned it all up juz now..tired lerhx..

Tiring dae...

It was nerve-wrecking and it was tiring... da job of emceeing tat is... i'm so... nervous wif lotsa ppl lookin at me.. listenin to every word i sae... i mean..its a gd thing but... i'm juz..nervous..juz...shy...

we had da OOC rehearsal thingy... it was erm... LOOONG!!! from 2.20pm till 5.30pm... its like.... 3 straight hours of rehearsing da lines..memorising them actually... and putting up a splendid performance... at da end of da dae.. everyone was grumpy i tink... wahahaha...

then on da OOC dae.. we da emcees, shall be wearing all white and black shoes... :D haharx.. Dignified people... actually dey wanted us to actually wear da sch U[2 tones of blue] wif da blazer[greyish green] and tie[for me is same as da blazer color but for da rest is..dark blue wif yellow thingy..].. but OMG.. juz imagine da color combination... so we insisted on wearin da white ''uniform'' as we call it.. lol it was really cool..

by da way..i actually PASSED my A Maths!!!!! wahahahah... partly thx to Pris.. :D i LOVE priscilla!!!! hehehehe.. den.. so far..i've failed my Bio... haf yet to tell my parents.. but yeah... hmmm..wat da heck... lol

i wanna go eat my dinner now.. so hungry..see ya guys!

Nobody's Home

I dun feel like goin home these few daes..... all bcos my sis and mum keep nagging at me... do tis do tat... all tis all tat.... tis really frustrates me and irritates me... even wen my sis wanna ask me to da sth..she more like COMMAND me.. i hate ppl commanding me... i seriously dun feel happy at home these daes... i wanna run away from all these.... wanna escape from them all... nobody seems to care abt me at home... sometimes in school too... but mostly at home... every dae afta a dae of... fun... excitement.. and stuff... i am reluctant to go home..to face my mum and sis... sure yes i wanna get bak to my com and see if 'whoever' is online... but... i juz cant take it anymore!!! i haf an operation to go through in 3 daes! and i haf an official opening to host in daes! i am FREAKIN nervous...am on da verge of BREAKIN DOWN!! but NOBODY cares!! nobody!!! argh!!!! i dunno y but i juz feel tat my mum and sis no longer appreciate me as much as dey did in da past... ever since my sis got married and pregnant and all tat.... i'm so stressed at home... i cant take it any longer... i mite break down.... i juz wanna escape...to get out of tis misery and lead life as peaceful as possible... i juz want to be appreciated..to be loved... i wan my family bak...